EDGE OF REALITY: THE GAME: THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL: THE README
CONTENTS
- AN INTRODUCTION FROM THE AUTHOR
- HOW TO INSTALL EDGE OF REALITY ON MY MICROSOFT INTERNATIONAL COMPUTING MACHINE
- HOT DOGS
- HOW DO YOU PLAY THIS STUPID GAME? I HATE IT! I HATE YOU! I HATE EVERYTHING!!!
- KNOWN BUGS
- SEVERAL UNKNOWN BUGS
- GENERAL TIPS
- SLIGHTLY MORE GENERAL TIPS
- EXTREMEY SPECIFIC TIPS
- HINTS FOR SOME OF THE MOST DEVILISH PUZZLES YOU GET JUST FOR READING THIS DOCUMENT
- HINTS ON WHERE TO FIND A VARIETY OF SECRETS
- WHY YOU SHOULD NOT OWN AN 11TH CENTURY NORMAN CASTLE
- CREDITS AND THANKS
- OTHER PROJECTS BY DUCKBILL PRO-DUCKTIONS
- CATS
- COPY PROTECTION: COLOUR IDENTIFICATION CHART
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
THIS IS A PAGE BREAK IT IS FANCY YOU ARE FANCY, I AM INTIMATING THAT YOU MAY BE GAY, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A GIRL, BUT OF COURSE THERE IS NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED OF IN THAT, ANY MORE THAN THERE IS SOMETHING TO BE ASHAMED OF IN OWNING AN 11TH CENTURY NORMAN CASTLE WHICH IS MORE OF A BURDEN THAN SHAMEFUL PER SE.
THERE IS STILL SOME SPACE ON THIS PAGE SO I AM GOING TO FILL IT WITH MY FAVOURITE PICTURE OF RAQUEL WELSH
I LIKE IT BECAUSE IT SHOWS THAT SHE IS JUST A REGULAR PERSON LIKE MYSELF OR THE GUY WHO PLAYED GILLIGAN IN GILLIGAN'S ISLAND, ALTHOUGH NEITHER OF US HAVE AN ISLAND NAMED AFTER US, SO ONCE AGAIN GILLIGAN HAS ONE UP ON US ALL. (ALSO IF YOU CAN’T SEE THE IMAGES, GO INTO PRINT PREVIEW!!!)
1. AN INTRODUCTION FROM THE AUTHOR
Hello.
I see that you are not asleep. This is good, because were you asleep, you would not be able to fully absorb this greeting and the sincerity with which I fling it. Trust me when I say that you are as greeted into the world of Edge of Reality as is humanly possible. Feel yourself being greeted all over. First your toes are feeling greeted, then your ankles, then your whole foot. Soon greeting is rising all the way up your leg, over your calves, your waist, your belly, and now, slowly, you feel this greeting rise over the whole of your body. Even your arms now, even the ends of your fingers feel well and truly greeted. Your face feels pretty greeted as well.
The only part of you that does not feel greeted is your left humorous. It feels shunned.
Welcome to the world of Reality, a world I was part of the formation of, so many years ago. Much like Milwaukee. Whatever the History Books tell you, Reality on the Norm was a group project born from the fertile and slightly promiscuous womb of the Adventure Game Studio Community. I actually was the first to proffer the name “Reality” and to design a few of the less popular characters. Yahtzee “Ben” Crowshaw made the first game, starring Davy Jones, and that, as they say, was cranberries. That. I meant “that.”
Since then, Reality-on-the-Norm has grown to include a complex history and story-line. There have been some great games in the community project, and I couldn't possibly begin to describe or insult them all. However, here's the story at the time EDGE begins.
Early on, Davy Jones, boy magician, was killed in a series of mysterious accidents and a few cruel games from a guy known as Captain Mostly. His girlfriend, amateur inventor Elandra was left to mourn his absence, despite numerous attempts to revive him. In one recent game, the main character also glued the town's silo shut, meaning they were soon to run out of food. Meanwhile, Mika Huy, ex-Hawaiian cub-reported had to report on the mysterious death of Bill Cosby and his reincarnation into a horrific zombie. Meanwhile, meanwhile, a chicken, known only as “the chicken” was led to investigate the city's richest citizen, The Baron.
After that, it gets kind of complicated.
Reality has a zombie for a mayor, several evil scientists within short driving range, a “Yahtzeebrand” store where the store-keep is a mindless zombie, a bar frequented by bizarre guests, a town bum whose personality changes every week, and a superhero with mommy issues, Thakbor the Great. I think I actually came up with one or two of those characters, back in the day. Who can say. Who cares?
My game begins just after the latest death of Davy Jones, the best animated character up until that point. But did Mika have interests in Davy? He did saver her life in an earlier adventure...
For more info and backstory, try the following key games:
Davy Jones: Lunchtime of the Damned
I Spy
Night/Vengeance of the Chicken
Davy Jones C'est Mort
2. HOW TO INSTALL EDGE OF REALITY ON MY MICROSOFT INTERNATIONAL COMPUTING MACHINE
I assume by now you have a Microsoft International Computing Machine, either wall or head-mounted for easy access. There are 12 steps to installing Edge of Reality to your system.
First, make sure, if your computer machine requires life-energy or conventional electrical current to keep the trained hamsters from resting that you have plugged it in. Second, if it is not always on, make sure it is turned on as well. Rubbing its harddrive sensuously while you whisper phrases in broken French will help.
Next, make sure you have copied the game from the 12 floppy disks provided. Be advised that any DOWNLOADED copies are illegal and will invite the black helicopters to descend on your house issuing magnum bullets. INTO YOUR FACE!!!
After you have wiped your harddrive (sensuously), unpack or simply move the file “Edge.exe” into a folder of your choice. The desktop will work, but is MORALLY REPREHENSIBLE. Also move Setup.bat.
On most modern head-mounted systems, the Setup.bat will not work (it was designed back in a day when DoS ruled the Earth, like a giant plant-eating quadruped, except violent). If you can run dos and understand it's simple language, it would be beneficial to run Setup.bat so that you can select any system specs that work for your screen. Many changes will cause the game to constantly crash though, so test first before playing. Ideally, you want to use a full-sized monitor at 640x480 as in lower resolution screens, the characters will appear squashed and decidedly lo-res. YOU MAY WISH TO FIDDLE WITH YOUR SCREEN RESULTION IN YOUR DISPLAY PREFERENCES!
Next, double-click on Edge.exe. The game will begin. To skip the opening logo-screen, click anywhere on the screen (sometimes two clicks are required). Watch the splash screen. There are many RON-sign splash screens, and a new one should be selected regularly. I wonder if any are anagrams?
From the title screen, you can click to start, or load the file of your choice from the overhead menu.
That's it!
3. HOT DOGS
While for the common man, or “prole” the hotdog is a delicacy far beyond his simple palette (thus the nickname “feces and rathair steak”), to us SUPREME BEINGS, the hotdog is a disgusting, rat-hair infested tube of death. Even the zesty vegetarian ones. However, Hot Dogs play an important part in this game.
A video game hotdog consists of 13 ingredients: A patty or “dog” in the shape of a dead worm, a bun (or “pair of buns”), mustard, ketchup, pickle relish, chopped onions and Cheese from a can in a vaguely “turd-like” configuration. Once assembled, the fun begins!
But I wonder, what would happen if we delayed the creation of the hotdog to feed it to someone else?
The mysterious world is yet to be fully understood, is it not?
4. HOW DO YOU PLAY THIS STUPID GAME? I HATE IT! I HATE YOU! I HATE EVERYTHING!!!
This is a typical reaction upon installing Edge of Reality for the first time.
The key to solving this dilemma is “patience” and “heavy barbiturates.”
The key gameplay of “Edge of Reality” consists of wandering around aimlessly clicking on everything without purpose or direction, much like real life. A right click will shift through your multitude of options (much like real life), including (and also limited to), a pair of legs in grey pantaloons representing the ability to WALK, a magnifying glass representing the ability to LOOK, peer at, or examine objects, a hand representing both TAKE and MANIPULATE, a comically large speech bubble representing the ability to SPEAK that all upper primates may one day possess, and the current inventory item which can be USEd on anything in the background, any character including Mika. Other icons may appear throughout the game, which are usually explained in a dry somewhat grating system of narration.
You can move by clicking the WALK icon anywhere on the screen that is accessible, or with the arrow keys on your keyboard.
The arrow keys are essential to certain parts of the game, but are a bit buggy in larger rooms, so be patient with them. Sometimes a combination of clicking and tapping are required. There is, regrettably, nothing I could do about that.
There is also a menu above Mika's head, right at the top of the screen. This is another way to access icons, and also offers access to both your inventory and the save/load/quit options.
There are also hotkeys to make this quick and extremely painful. F5 saves your game, F7 restores it, F9 starts all over again, and ctrl + q quits!
5. KNOWN BUGS
There are several know bugs in Edge of Reality that were either beyond my ability to code, or native to the early version of AGS I was using. Later versions of AGS can be found at www.bigbluecup.com, and all these bugs have been fixed, but the scripting methods I used made an upgrade impossible.
1. Mika's “hit detection box” is far too big and gets in the way of some things.
This was necessary in order to create certain puzzles, and blocking it off outside of those puzzles just didn't work. Navigate Mika out of the way of stuff you want to click on, it's not really that hard.
2. Mika jumps around when she speaks.
This would have been really really hard to fix using the AGS version I had, and added a bit of character to the game.
3. When you die, a Restore, Restart Quit Dialogue pops up, but nothing happens when you click.
That’s not a bug, dude, it’s a merciful joke.
4. Rarely, but from time to time, the game's colours screw up or it just crashes.
Save early, save often, that's the motto of Sierra, and it's especially true here. If you do get weird colours, you can actually usually save, quit and then restart/load again. But save on a new file, just in case. This is really rare, but it does happen, and there was nothing I could do. If the screen goes all black, but doesn't crash, just keep playing and it will spring back again. Nobody knows why this happens.
5. Characters sometimes shrink or grow at the edge of the screen.
A minor, but unfixable issue.
6. A certain set of elevators are very glitchy.
The glitches are mostly graphical in nature and basically can't be fixed. They should not affect gameplay, and if they do, write me an email.
7. Some of the minigames/special gameplay reward modes are glitchy.
The mini-games are all optional. All but one work just fine, and one crashes because of the high amount of data it processes. The mini-games just provide a few secret prizes, so if you want to play them, save first.
6. SEVERAL UNKNOWN BUGS
1. The Boswanian Smoke Fly
A deadly bug from sub-saharan Boswania that has been spotted crossing the Canadian border while the dollar is high. The smoke fly can be recognized by its grey musty coating and thick concentrations of industrial smoke released when killed or frightened. Stay away whenever possible!
2. The Gnat-zies
An ultra-fascist band of tiny flying bugs that work as a gang to oust ethnic minorities, jews, catholics and banjo players. The Gnat-zies are a horrible, racist, sexist, and highly nationalist class of insects, but because they kill Smoke Flies, they are sometimes tolerated.
3. The Dirtwingian Dusk Beetle
Did you know that Beetles are among the most biodiverse creatures on the planet? That there are more species of beetle than just about anything else, from the Dung, to the Egyptian Scarab, to the June or the George Harrison? The Dirtwingian Dusk Beetle is a particularly large beetle that actually pushes the moon out of the sky and digs up the sun every night. They are very large, and their eyes are indistinguishable from stars. Seriously. If it was just the turning of the Earth that caused the moon to appear to go down in the morning, then how come on clear days it's still sometimes up there? Huh? The Dirtwingian Dusk Beetle, that's why!
7. GENERAL TIPS
These General Tips will help you navigate this stupid and slightly insane game:
1. Look at EVERYTHING. Especially busts. Chicks dig that.
2. Take EVERYTHING. Just like the church stock room, you should steal as much as possible.
3. Assume the game actually works. I tested it a lot. A LOT.
4. Read descriptions of things. Often I will bury clues in the game text. But not this text.
5. Save early and save often! There are at least two major and highly divergent endings to this game, so you may as well have at least two save-games. Make them descriptive to save you some time. There are very few dead ends, but you may as well be prepared in case of crash.
6. Make your own fun! Use things on other things, or find your own quests. You'll find there are many rewards for doing quests early, trying to solve stuff that isn't pressing.
7. Be patient, and come back later if you get stuck. Don't hurl your laptop at the wall in frustration, even if you live in one of those crazy-castles that are totally inflatable and very sturdy. You never know whose fingerprints will be on that wall.
8. Go to the Hints and Tips forum at www.bigbluecup.com for help, if you're totally stuck.
9. HAVE FUN!
8. SLIGHTLY MORE GENERAL TIPS
1. Avoid bad things unless you're supposed to do stuff with those bad things.
2. Check some spots multiple times. You know the one.
3. There is one key to winning the game: Figuring out how to solve the puzzles and then solving them. Also, walking from one place to another.
4. If you don't get the joke, assume it's just a reference and you're tremendously ignorant.
5. Remember, your mouse is not a baseball bat, unless, through some freak coincidence, it just happens to also be a functional baseball bat, in which case, I want to see a photo of your set-up.
6. Adventure-game logic is not the same as regular logic. Think more oddly.
7. Avoid the noid!
8. Your phone has both numbers AND letters on it. Almost all phones are the same.
9. Good food needs good ingredients. Try to make your meals at home with one key flavour and one accent that works well with the dominant flavour. For example, pecans and maple work well on salmon. That's just a general tip though, and has no baring on the game.
9. EXTREMEY SPECIFIC TIPS
1. If your surname is Ignoramus, try to name your upcoming child “Notta” instead of choosing your grandfather's name, “Completeandutter.”
2. In one specific room, you can literally “touch the sky.”
3. Our laser printer actually does a pretty good job if it's been running for a while, but it may help to take out the huge cartridge thing and shake it a bit.
4. Watch “The Wire.” It's a good show, but you might need a few episodes to get into it.
5. In two rooms, you can annoy the narrator by doing the same thing over and over again ad naseum. In both rooms, you will be awarded. It's obvious at the time which rooms these are and the rewards are pretty pointless.
6. When working on headrolls, lay down on the floor with your head tilted to one side. Hold the ball down firmly over your temple for a few minutes, then release and let it rest there for as long as you can stay in that position. Switch sides again and again until this comes very natural to you before moving on.
10. HINTS FOR SOME OF THE MOST DEVILISH PUZZLES YOU GET JUST FOR READING THIS DOCUMENT
There are many crazy puzzles in this game, and some are quite fiendish to work out. A few are downright unfair.
Hint 1: Bridge
You need two items to make the bridge, but one is still in use. How can you get that second part out of use?
Hint 2: Maze
Did you get the map? You don't need it, but if you can rig a distraction, you can get the map.
Hint 3: Bathroom
The colour of that wall is familiar...
Hint 4: Coffee Break
He doesn't have taste buds, but he does have eyes.
Hint 5: Guns
What prize do you actually need? You just need the one.
Hint 6: Sheep
Okay, so you can't get an original. This guy knows his art, but if they were the same size...
Hint 7: Tones
Just listen to the security tapes over and over for more clues. I seriously originally did this so you would have to watch the opening scene over and over again, but I actually gave you the tapes as an additional clue. Be glad I didn't stay a complete and utter tonk!
Hint 8: Pit
What haven't you used yet? Did you try to take everything from the building you're in? This is the most elaborate puzzle in the game. If you get stuck, lacking an item, there is in fact a way back.
Hint 9: Panel
Did you minimize his window?
Hint 10: Run
Well? Run!!!
11. HINTS ON WHERE TO FIND A VARIETY OF SECRETS
1. In the pile?
2. Behind the house?
3. He's a crazy farmer, and he might need some “protection.”
4. Did you try talking to him?
5. Did you search it during the cut-scene?
6. Did you click on everything with your groping fingers?
7. Did you come back to this bizarre place?
8. Maybe you need a mask?
12. WHY YOU SHOULD NOT OWN AN 11TH CENTURY NORMAN CASTLE
Yes, there are many of these, generally in ruins and/or disarray. They are cold and blocky, and largely exposed to the elements. Many have existent museums inside with many expensive employees. Yes, many of the grounds of them were invaded or razed by Bodecia as well, but these are not reasons to not own an 11th century Norman castle today.
There is something far more serious at work.
The Knights Templar will hunt you down.
Look. Just for a moment, let us consider the death of Eleanor of Aquitaine. Eleanor certainly owned her share of Norman castles, though, as of course you know, she was an entirely 12th century personality. At her height of power, no one could out maneuver EoA. She was a kingmaker, much like a Checkers piece that just keeps jumping to the edge of the board and back again. She was also a very good dancer. That part is less known. Her dancing was said to have “alighted the heart” of Nigel de Longchamps and inspired his lesser known “Olde Layde I Sawe Dancinge.”
Here are some important and highly relevant facts about Eleanor of Aquatine you may recall from History Class.
1. She hated being called by her “peasant nickname,” “El' Aqua-teen.” This lasted well into her dotage, and it was only two weeks before her untimely death at age 82 that she admitted that the moniker was beginning to make her feel young again, despite all this imprisonment and constant family squabbling.
2. She is known to have collected early mechanical clocks. These were powered using a simple and yet deeply intricate “spring and pendulum” system and a series of finely carved interlocking pins, a system that is largely lost today.
3. She was killed by the Knights Templar.
Now because I am a powerful psychic, I know what you're thinking. Jim you're thinking, because you can't remember my name, Jim, how is it that the Knights Templar killed an 82 year old woman when the historical consensus is that she died of old age. Well first of all, Tom, because I cannot remember your name either, Tom, it was in fact considered a historical fact until March of last year, when modern Forensics were finally able to uncover the truth.
EoA was killed by the Knights Templar for owning too many Norman Castles. And they did so by INVENTING DEATH BY OLD AGE. Before that point, the only ways to die were fatal stabbing, crucifixion, burning, and the consumption. That's how powerful the Knights Templar are. They actually created mortality just so they could kill a single human being. And that is the fundamental reason why owning a Norman castle would be a huge mistake. Plus, the Knights just hate the number 11. The two ones side by side represent the rise of the antichrist, something the Knights Templar are apparently opposed to.
The thing is, most 11th century castles are filled with traps and tarps built by the Templar Knights themselves. The Knights were the mafia of their time, a tight-knit organization of completely legitimate businessmen who occasionally tied people's feet to rocks and hurled them into the Thames. Or whatever river was handy. However, unlike the Italian Mafia, the Knights were amazing swordsmen (Guido “the blademaster” Deangelo notwithstanding), and possessed the stealth of ninjas. They were entrusted to surveillance throughout the old world, and thus are termed today the “CIA” of their time. Do you know what this means? IT MEANS YOU ARE GOING UP AGAINST “MAFIA NINJA SUPER-SPIES WITH SWORDS! AND YOU ARE HIDING IN A HUGE, EMPTY CASTLE. DO YOU REALIZE HOW CRAZY THAT IS????
And don't you think for a moment that the Knights Templar are “retired,” or “old news” or “dead.” They are everywhere, still today. The truth is, you can't get a job, or a mortgage or a small business loan without the approval (either official or implied) of a Templar Knight. But they hide and keep to the shadows, their sanctified blades sheathed. Do you see the man bent double, ravaged with age outside your window? He is bent over because he is concealing his enormous Bastard Sword, the scent of death on his breath is your own, and his age is a thin veneer over the toned, muscular visage of a highly trained Templar Knight! Give him some pennies or else leave a shoe full of dough over night in a well sealed bag. If the bag is gone in the morning, you know you will be safe one more day. If the bag has been replaced with a loaf of artisan bread, you know you are in fact dealing with a Stealth Baker.
Do not trust the Stealth Bakers either.
13. CREDITS AND THANKS
Due to scripting problems and limits of space, I was not able to thank everyone properly for their assistance in this game. Below is a list of people who deserve credit, and or special mention.
Story and All that Jazz
Blake Speers and the Ron Community
Scripting
Blake Speers
The AGS Community
Background Art From
John campbell
Ben “Yahtzee” Crowshaw
Mike Davis
Edward Day
Endmundo Ruiz
Ghanem
Dave Gilbert
Anthony “Cornjob” Hahn
Ben Pettengill
Me
Character Art
Ben “Yahtzee” Crowshaw
Edward Day
Captain Mostly
Blake Speers
And others...
Additional Art and Contributions By
Captain Mostly
Creed Malay
Music
Mark “Mods” Lovegrove
Blake Speers
Various Artists
Sound Fx
Blake Speers
Klik and Play
Bill Cosby
Yahtzee
Testers
Original Beta Test
Dave Gilbert
Tobias Schmitt
Potentiially AGA
Final Beta Test
Alpha2T
Jon
Not Layabout, who clearly signed himself up and then true to name, did absolutely nothing. :P
Reality On-the-Norm Concept
Gravityyyy,
Bionic Bill Smith,
Ed20,
Layabout,
Sarah,
Kittywisdom,
Scripter,
Yahtzee,
J.L,
Me, and Others!
Special Thanks
Brendan Speers
People Whose Ideas I Stole
Bill Cosby (the real one)
Ernest Borgnine
Jeff Krulik
Chris Jones
The ENTIRE Adventure Game Studio Community
My Supportive Wife, K
14. Other DuckBill Projects
Of course, this is neither the first nor the last project to come out of DuckBill ProDucktions. Some past and current projects include:
One Long Thursday: My first novel, completed in 1999, but in constant total rewrites ever since. Expect it maybe never.
Flags of Doom: An action-platform-puzzler with my friend Michaeld DeGroot, heavily inspired by Jumpman. Versions come out every few years. Another one is due in early 2009.
Semi-St. Circus: The Victoria Juggling Club's heyday, 3 years of awesome juggling compressed into one double-DVD set. Still on sale in some areas.
Sam Quest VIII: A Text Adventure based on the horrible backwards traveling life of Sam, Medieval Blacksmith's assistant. Good luck finding it!
Spring Fever: An as-yet-unfinished update of Sam Quest, using a 3D point and click interface and starring Mallory O'Moosey instead of Sam.
Drake and Kropkin's Big Adventure Thingy: Coming Hopefully by December 2009.
15. CATS
COLOUR
IDENTIFICATION CHART
THIS
CHART IS IN THE GAME, BUT SOMETIMES THE COLOURS BECOME MESSED UP ON SOME
SYSTEMS. I WILL NOW PROVIDE IT TO YOU
FOR FREE!
ENJOY!
